Your Immortal Heart Belongs To Me
by EXPLOSIVE BONDAGE
Summary: Hidan is your basic mass murderer...Kakuzu is your everyday common thief, but what were to happen if the two decided to hit the same dude and the same house, on the same day. Rated M for profound language and in the smexual nature.
1. Getting out

**Chapter 1.**

**Getting away.**

**I do not own Naruto....But I own THIS fanfiction...and it's my VERY FIRST ONE!  
So don't burn me.

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**Hidan's POV**

**Blood. Why did I smell blood. That burning copper smell trapped in my nose. I tried to open my eyes but I was surrounded by darkness. No matter how hard I tried they just wouldn't open, was I blind. But it took only seconds to realize that they were already open. My back was pressed against something that felt like a vacuum. I reached for it and felt it's rough fabric and plastic like handle...yep a vacuum. **

**My legs were pressed against a hard wooden wall. I kicked rapidly at it and it seemed to rattle....like a door. I almost leaped for it and latched around the door knob....yep a door....was I in a closet? More importantly, WHY was I in a closet? And suddenly, my hand slipped off the knob dfo to the wet sticky blood on my hands...My head banged against the vacuum. "FUCK!!!" I bitched rubbing my head... I slowly stood up and with BOTH hands, grabbed the door knob....twisted.....the door clicked.....locked......**

**I pounded on the knob, like it was going to break. But accomplished nothing, what would I do?... What could i do?...My head throbbed, Not because of the vacuum, but because of something else, but I couldn't think what..A sudden light flickered in my small closet space. It was coming from the key hole...someone had turned on the in the other room. My sudden hope. I looked through the key hole to see none other then the made with a cart. She was a blond with her hair up in a poofy ponytail. Her expression told me that she did NOT want to be here. In this room. I began banging at the door, screaming and yelling for her attention..."HEY BITCH! OPEN THE DOOR!!!" I screamed rather rudely. She jumped almost ten feet out her skin at the sound of my voice. When she realized exactly what it was, she ran over to the closet with the keys, unlocking the door. **

**And with the sudden bright light, I felt like I had just entered heaven, until the sight of a messy, blood stained hotel room appeared. My peaceful heaven seized to exist when I heard that damn maids screech of horror at the sight of me. "ARE YOU OK!?" She yelled rushing toward me, "Should I call an ambulance?" I looked down at my body, I was completely covered in blood.....  
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**Before I could answer, she quickly pulled out her phone and began to dial. I quickly grabbed it away and closed it. "No that's ok. I'm pretty sure the blood isn't mine.....My name is Hidan." I reasured. She stammered..."M-my name is Deidara...Dei for short..." She lowered her eyes and glanced around the room. **

**"Why were you in the closet?" She asked...**

**"What do men usually do in closet sweety?" I teased...**

**"Seriously..."**

**"..."**

**"Well..."**

**"I'm not sure...."**

**"You don't remember?"**

**"No..."**

**"Do you even know what happened yesterday?"**

**"No....."**

**What DID happen yesterday? I wondered to myself, waiting for an answer to just magically appear...**

**"Well," She began. "A man was murdered here...a rich man, went by the name of Masashi Kishimoto...He was here on a business trip and apparently someone broke into his room.....startled him, and ripped his limbs apart.... separately...He was caught, standing over the body...looking just as confused as we all were...But no one knows why he killed him....He was just a common thief..."**

**I stopped listening to her after her last sentence......**

**All thought came back to my head. I had murdered Masashi kishimoto that day. I had ripped him apart...why? Why do murderers kill is a better question....**

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**Flashback:**

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** I stood there, holding the knife to my mouth, and tasted the sweet coming from the tip. Then suddenly, i heard cop sirens, And in panic, I rushed for the window....but sopped in my tracks when i saw a man watching me. A green eyed man with a mask covering his mouth. Hate in his eyes, I felt like death was among me, So i did was most panicky people did, ran for the door....Sadly, my stupidity got the best of me and I ran into the CLOSET door....crashed into the wall, pretty hard I may add, and passed out..... pathetic, right?**

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**End  
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**I looked the amid over, with a devilish smirk.....**

**"What?"**

**She asked....**

**I grabbed a hold of her arm violently. "Yeh know...." I began.. "I have never left a witness back in my days..." I chuckled. "W-what!?" She asked startled, in an attempt to lamely free her hand....I only gripped harder...anymore and it probably would have snapped. She screeched loudly and I pulled her into my chest, smacking the back of her head. Her eyes widened, then faded, then shut....Passed out....I was tired and wasn't thinking straight so I just bluntly tossed ehr into the closet, and shut the door. My real goal was to get clean and the heck out of here without being seen. So, I stepped into the bathroom, (because that's what rich hotels have in there rooms 3)**

**And took a shower....and as I did such, I became lost in thought.....About the man who stole the credit for my murder....but who was he? The maid said he was caught....But the murderer was me. Did he admit? Why would he? he was a thief... Not a mass murderer such as myself. I stared down at the orange colored water going down the drain do to the blood washing out of my silky white hair smoothly balanced skin.**

**As soon as I was done, I put on some different clothing, (Masashi Kishimoto's) It wasn't my style...it was kinda businessy....But that was ok. As soon as I got home I could change into my regular outfit. And like that.....I was gone.....**

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**Well, this was just the beginning...but I hope you liked it so far....Please comment. o 0o I know it was short because I rushed the first chapter....And yeah...It's a Yaoi, but there is no Yaoi yet. 3**

**Preview of next chapter:**

**He placed the guns tip on my forehead......the drunken bastard. **

**"Pein please!!!" the blue haired women screamed with tears running down her face...**

**My hands clenched shut, But i did not move......There wasn't much i could do at this point....This man was drunk....he WOULD shoot me. "Any last words?" he snickered at my direction.....But all I could do was laugh...  
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	2. Say sober

**Chapter 2.  
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**Say sober.  
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**"Woah, did you ever realize how SHINY the stars are?" -Points to ceiling light-**  
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**Hidan's POV**

**I walked slowly, keeping a reasonable speed. I didn't want to seem suspicious. I was carrying a bag of my blood stained clothing. It had only been just a few minutes but seemed like I was already a thousand miles gone. I sighed, staring down at my feet as I walked, not entirely SURE where I was going and WHY I was going there...But it was just how things were. I was to deep in thought about this so called, "THIEF" that had stolen my kill. But I should have been happy, right? I was off the hook, and that sucker was locked up...but something about it didn't seem right...not at all...**

**I sighed, not realizing I was now in front of a bar. I smirked, "i really need this..." I mumbled, and raced to the ally to throw my bag away...People get hurt in bars ALL the time, a few blood stained clothes shouldn't make much of a difference. Inside, there were flashing lights and strippers workin' there way down the poles....Stripper joint....I never really found myself into porn......Never really been all that social either. I hated whores of any sort. They just sorta pissed me I hated the guys who payed for that ugly meatless body to be all over them. I must have been drunk after the first few drinks, because what do yeh know, one of those skanky ass whores with the strapped mini skirt and the high stupid looking gogo boots walked my way. She had a cig in her mouth and blew with every step she took. Her hair was a dark shade of blue and a single flower was placed on the right side of her bun.**

**"Hey there..." She said in those arousing voices that only strippers could pull off. **

**She placed her hand n the table and leaned over just a bit to get to my level, (Considering I was sitting at the table drunk...)**

**"Yeah, what do yeh wan'...." I said semi uneducated...No one in a bar really was though...**

**"I just thought you looked lonely." And suddenly the room flipped because she was now on my lap pressing herself up against my chest.**

**"Yeh fuckin' whore..." I growled but went along with it by clasping my arms around her waste, but in an instant she was turned around holding my head up and shoving her smoke stained tongue through my teeth. I forced myself into it as well...this is what I ment by 'drunk' and pushed up on her, making us both fall completely out of the chair. And before I got TO into it, (THANK GOD...No seriously...) a man with orangy red hair pulled me completely up with 1 pull of his hand. "What the fuck are you doin!?" He snarled at me, pushing against my chest and knocking me backward..."Konan WHAT THE FUCK!?" I heard him yell, followed by a slapping noise and a high pitched female scream. I arose from where I lye, "Hey hey hey, now this isn't all that necessary I mean SHE WA-" I was cut off by his fist thrashed upon my face, I fell into a round table near by and into a few glasses of whine. I heard people gasp and other yell, "BAR FIGHT!" In the distance. "Please Pein don't...." I heard 'Konan' cry. And this 'Pein' Person just caused blood to trickle down my chin...**

**I rubbed it off in a heart beat and stood back up, "You bitch...You FUCKING BITCH..." I yelled letting my anger get the best of me...Pein snickered in my direction like the drunken idiot he was, basically scrambling....without realizing it..."No you'll get hurt!" Konan cried almost shakily. **

**"Awww. you here that, Your little bitch over there has doubts in you..." I taunted.... And with his smile, mine faded....**

**"She meant you..." His fists came for me again, but this time, I wasn't AS drunk, so I attempted to duck from it. My sleeve caught on a broken glass bottle and ripped a bit....but why was that important NOW? I launched forward with my fist clenched tightly, aiming straight for his face.**

**But my hand froze, inches before from fear, but from shock...he had pulled out a gun.  
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**He placed the guns tip on my forehead......the drunken bastard. **

**"Pein please!!!" the blue haired women screamed with tears running down her face...**

**My hands clenched shut, But i did not move......There wasn't much i could do at this point....This man was drunk....he WOULD shoot me. "Any last words?" he snickered at my direction.....But all I could do was laugh. He gave me a, 'What the hell is wrong with you!?" Look. **

**"SHOOT ME!" I yelled, almost in a taunting town."DO IT!" I was almost begging him.**

**He seemed clonfused at first, "DON'T DOUGHT ME!!" He yelled pressing the cold metal harder into my scalp. **

**My psychotic laughter grew louder, And everyone just watched. "I'll fucking kill you..." he threatened, my laughing stopped and I raised my hands up to the guns trigger...."Let me help you..." I teased, and together we pulled it.**

**17 different screams came from 14 different directions..Blood trickled down my face....and everyone watched in awh...**

**I broke the silence with psychotic giggling. Pein dropped the gun and backed to the counter. I watched as it clanged on the tiled floor, bent down, and lifted it..."Immortality..." I began raising my hand with the gun in it. "Yeh gotta love it..." I aimed for Pein, he flinched when I amde only the SOUND of a gun going off. I snickered at him. "Your such a pussy..."Now would ahve been the correct time to leave, but something was bothering me. Konan. Who had been watching me not in fear, but Like I was a god of some sort. I smiled at her, and she smiled back, but her smile only faded away after I pointed the gun to HER head, "Whore...." And pulled the trigger....**

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**Well? o 0o I know...Still no Yaoi. :'D BUT NEXT CHAPPY WE MEET KUZU CHAN~ ;DDD**

**Preview:**

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**He hung up the phone as I was in mid sentence. Rude Bitch. "HEY KAKUZU! PICK IT BACK UP!" I yelled slapping the glass. He turned his head, but motioned me to turn around. There stood a tall dark man, with paper and tazer gun in his hands. "Sir, are you Hidan?"....**

**"Yeah.... what's it to yuh?" I asked slouching in the wooden chair..**

**"Your under arrest for attempted murder..."  
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	3. Orange Jumper

**Chapter 3.  
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**Orange jumper.  
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**AKA. Jail sucks. :'D**  
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**Hidan's POV**

**I sat in my cumfy little bed at my one man apartment, looking up at the ceiling fan that had been spinning for approximately 3 hours and 52 seconds. Just thinking about the events that had happened today. I had gotten away with murder...again..... Got drunk, AND killed a whore, and left no trace? I felt so powerful~ I mean, I was immortal. My body healed faster then normal, so the bullet wound was ALREADY fading. I was IMPOSSIBLE to find. And I had nothing to worry about. I FINALLY rolled over and shut my eyes with a grin. My hand touched over the rubbery button of the remote, thus, turning on the television. On flickered the news, which is what it usually was on. I liked to watch my murders being investigated.. **

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Investigation:**_ Masashi Kishimoto's body had been found severed in thirty different places, and cut up into little binded pieces. The murderer, Kakuzu Donyoku had been caught at this crime and confessed to the hole thing. He is now being held in the waynyard county prison- _

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_**"THAT BITCH!" I yelled in irritation, throwing the remote at the television screen. I hated that fuck for stealing my murder, I hated him for taking my credit, and I hated him for...JUST being him...Why would he admit to it anyway? IT DIDN'T CONCERN HIM...I huffed, regaining my thoughts. I then realized the prison they had sent him to. "WayneYard County...prison...." That was three blocks...THREE BLOCKS from where I currently was living...**(Yes..very smart for a murder to be living near a prison...) .** And for some ODD reason, I decided I was going to pay the little fuck a visit. I quickly rolled off my bed and grabbed a note pad that lay open on a desk in the corner, also pulling out a pen and scribbled the name down. I smiled....I don't know how, But that bitch was gonna pay....Why was a mad about this any way? Well, Masashi Kishimoto was a big hit...HIS DEATH would be FAMOUS! And the credit goes to some little pansy? ...HELL IT WOULD! **

**I tossed the note pad back on the table and plopped lazily back on my small bed. Shut my eyes, and drifted away. And what do people normally do in there sleep? DREAM of course. But this wasn't just any dream. It was a Jashiniatic encounter. In it, I was laying in my ritual circle, surrounded by darkness. Hovering above me was a blackened shadow, rather short. It's face looked much to narrow to be human. Was it a trick of the light. No. Nothing THAT real could be a trick, could it? It WAS a dream after all. I reached my hand forward trying to touch the chin of it, but realized it was to far away for someone laying on the floor to grasp. So I stood myself up and looked at the figure, noticing the brightly yellow colored eyes, and instantly, I kneeled. **

**"Messenger of Jashin.." It spoke lowly. It's tone seemed to be as if it were struggling to speak English.**

**I slowly lifted my head, but not by much, "What news does my lord have?" I asked, wondering why lord Jashin could possibly need to speak with 'me' of all people.**

**"It's about Masashi Kishimoto..."**

**"..."**

**"You see, lord Jashin was looking forward to THAT particular soul, you let it slip my boy..."**

**"BUT THAT WASN'--"**

**"HUSH YOU!"**

**It's voice echoed through the room in an almost Mono-tone way.**

**"....I'm..sorry..." I said submissively, nervous, yet frustrated at the same time.**

**"Let me sum things up for you...." It said almost as irritated as I thought it was...It placed a smallish blue box in front of me. I watched the movements slowly. Then payed my attention toward the box. The spirit like figure lifted the box lid, and the inside was something indescribable. It was screaming inner turmoil.."See this?" The thing said, with a cocked up smirk, startling me, "It's your immortality.."**

**"What about it.." I tried to say without showing fear or being rude to the messenger. **

**"By the name of Jashin, this will be relinquished from you....Until you can prove your case." **

**"...."**

**"Get the man to admit it wasn't his...Otherwise, your screwed."**

**Before I could even defend, argue or ANYTHING, The messenger disappeared in a gust of royal purple smoke, and my eyes shot open, lying in my bed....I look out the window, the sun either setting or rising...I couldn't quite tell. Instantly, I leaped from my bed and headed for the door, grabbing my over coat on the way. I rushed down the street like an Olympic race. I wasn't sure whether that dream was true or just another dream, but I wasn't going to take the chance, I made it to the court yard prison, maybe 20 minutes after leaving the house. And entered in slowly...**

**I was stared at, but I let them stare, It was like being the outcast at school,...which I've already been there....I walked up to the desk, "I'm here for visiting and shit...." I said quietly, almost like a drug deal. My eyes shifted away from the women as I said it, She was smoking and blew smoke in my direction as she spoke. "Name..." Her voice was tense and annoying. I shifted my eyes back at her..., "Hidan.." I mumbled....**

**She gave me a look, "HIS..Name..." She said, irritated, which irritated me, "Oh........Kakuzu Donyoku?" I said, unsure...**

**"One moment..." She lifted her chubby body up from the desk and headed to the back, came out with some paper. Her pencil in between her teeth, "Head to the booth sweety." She said pointing i the direction I was suppose to go. I lazily slumped over and sat in one of the booths.**

**A few minutes past, but it felt like FOREVER...I layed my head on the desk waiting, till I seen from the corner of my eye, someone had sat down at the other side...I lifted my head from the counter to see a tanned man with stitching's across his face and arms, his bangs lightly hung down, his eyes oddly colored, but mesmerizing. I stared at him, frozen. His eyes then shifted downward to his hand, I looked only to see he was pointing to the phone. I blushed, oddly embarrassed, picking up the little phone next to the glass wall. "Hello?" I asked, if though I could not see the man through the glass.."Your the one who needs to talk to me....." he said calmly."'Oh yeah..."**

**I didn't understand why I was acting so stupid now....of all moments....this was important , and I was acting like a drunk.. "Yes....The murder of Masashi Kishimoto...let's just say," I began, "I know you didn't do it..."**

**There was a moment of silence in the room. Until his voice came on the line, "I believe your mistaken..." It ticked me off. "For you couldn' possibly know, unless you were there...Unless you actually WERE THERE, so YOU must be the murderer..."**

**He said it in that little mello toned just about pushed my buttons. NO MAN, could be THAT CALM in prison..."You listen here you little fuck--"**

**He hung up the phone as I was in mid sentence. Rude Bitch. "HEY KAKUZU! PICK IT BACK UP!" I yelled slapping the glass. He turned his head, but motioned me to turn around. There stood a tall dark man, with paper and taser gun in his hands. "Sir, are you Hidan?"....**

**"Yeah.... what's it to yuh?" I asked slouching in the wooden chair..**

**"Your under arrest for attempted murder..."**

**My mind filled with nothingness.....fuck...I began rushing passed the officer as fast as my legs would carry, only to bust into two more waiting for me. They crashed me to the floor, and beat me as hard as they could. I shut my eyes, "FUCK THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING!" I screeched, giving in...They handcuffed my arms and pushed my head against the floor. I managed to get a glance back over at the booth, Kakuzu sat there with his palm against his cheek, and with a slight wave. I gritted my teeth. "Bastard.."**

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WOOH~ And there you have it. But it gets MUCH better kiddies. :'D here will be the next part,**

**Preview of next chapter:**

**I looked around as everyone gawked at me as if I were famous. I sighed staring at them all in the cold white shower..**

**"Before ANYONE warns me NOT to drop the soap, Please know that I may LIKE IT~"  
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**I stated humbly. It was obviously sarcasm, but I could give a damn. But as I did so, I squeezed the soap bar I was clenching onto, and it slipped out of my palm, I desperately reached for it, but it hit the puddle in between my legs......Fuck...**

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